Public Speaking Anxiety

I was inspired to write about public speaking because of my friend who is very bright but is soooooo afraid of speaking in public. He's even trembling when he speaks to some people.

I was amazed when I read an article saying that fear of death is only second to fear of public speaking. It made me think and say to myself, yes I think it's right. Even I, am afraid to speak in public most of the time before. I am even afraid to attend seminars and workshops for fear that I would be asked to speak in front of other people. But fortunately, I have learned how to manage (although not totally eradicate) the feeling of fear and nervousness whenever I speak in front of a group of people. I still feel nervous but I can survive speaking in public.

Most of the time we fear speaking with a person in authority or a person who has a higher position than us. We feel intimidated, I guess that's the correct term. But why? For me, it was for lack of self confidence and for being overly shy. When I was young, I am not an outgoing person and I would rather read a book than talk to other people. But now that I'm working, there's always a need to speak to some people and I had to muster enough courage to do that.

There's another factor that makes us afraid of speaking, it's being unprepared. More often, we are confident to talk about a topic that we know very well so that's one way that we can do to boost our confidence.

I can't give a definite advice on how one can overcome the fear of public speaking but I can say that this fear can definitely be conquered.

As Bertrand Russell said,

"To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom"

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WORDLESS WEDNESDAY: RAFTING IN VILLA ESCUDERO

Location: Villa Escudero, Tiaong, Quezon
Photo taken by: My friend, Hanzel

Tagging of the Tags, The Ultimate Bloggers’ Meme

Sharing tags is one of the important ways for making not only friends but social network as well. And I thank Marikenya for sending me this tag.



In turn, I would like to share this tag with some of my new friends and readers. I hope you can find time to tag your friends as well.

monaco / UnderHeavens! / Meng / Selif / stevenhumour / maria lourdes / Herbert / Kirhat / CTN / maline

In making the tag, follow these Rules:
1. Copy from ::Start Copy here:: through ::End Copy Here::.
2. Add your blog to the list. Feel free to add all your other blogs. Just make sure to post this to each of the blog you added in the list.
3. Tag other online friends you know.You don’t need to be tag in order to join. If you want to join just post this one in your blog.
4. Let me know your blog’s name and url by leaving me a comment. I will add you to the master list.That way, everyone is happy and can meet new friends too!
5. Come back once in a while to get the master list! Let’s see how this makes our Technorati and PR goes up!
6. DO NOT REMOVE THIS: scrap page made by Yen. Using alphas and tapes from Kate H., flowers from Ida,paper by Catrine.

1. Me and Mine 2. Creative In Me 3.Little Peanut 4. Pea in a Pod 5. Sugar Magnolias 6. Chez Francine 7. Le bric à brac de Cherie 8. La Place de Cherie 9.Super Nova and Sweet Pain 10. Avee's Adventures 11. Fil-Am Stories 12. Air Sick 13. Essay of Life 14. All About Reviews 15. From PI With Love 16. A Mom's Note 17. Tasteful Voyage 18. Beauty Kikay 19. Everyday Life 20. Fil-Oz Blog 21. More on Health 22. Ozlife Begins 23. Rants and Ramblings 24.Taurian’s Bible 25. What A World 26. Jcelyn's Journal27. Pinay Mom in Czech Republic, 27. Pinaymama's Diary 28. Breath Technology 29. Marikenya 29. Rizza 30.

Yes or No to Death Penalty?

The gruesome, senseless and very violent killing of ten human beings (9 bank employees and 1 client) recently in a bank in Laguna made me shudder and weep not only for the lost lives but for their families as well. It made me ask questions like, Why do the robbers have to kill them?, Why don't they just take the money and flee?, Why did God allow it happen to those people?

This incident has made me angry, made me speak ill of those people who committed this crime. And for a lot of people, to revive the death penalty seems to be the answer to this problem. But, is it? It made me think about it too since I had been hearing this issue for a few days now. And as if it's not enough, just this morning my officemate showed us an email he got containing the pictures of the victims which were taken from the crime scene. There were even 3 persons who were lying face down on the floor, with gun shot wounds on their heads. I assume they were made to lie face down on the floor by the bank robbers but even if they did, they were still killed.

If I would only use my emotion to decide, I would say, yes the people who did it should be killed too. But we can't just do that. We have to consider a lot of things like the justice system here in the Philippines. The manner of determining the innocence or guilt of a suspect here in the Philippines is quite unreliable. A lot of people can be corrupted. What if the suspect is rich and he uses his money to bribe some people just to clear his name and point to someone else as the killer or rapist? These are just a few of the things we need to consider, there are a lot more that I haven't mentioned here.

As for me, I still have to really think hard before I can decide. For now, I still believe that God allows things to happen for a reason but don't ask me what his reason is because I have been asking that question too.

Two days of fun in San Narciso, Zambales

I was in San Narciso, Zambales last Wednesday and Thursday with my officemates. It was our time to unwind, enjoy and make new friends.

We left Marikina at exactly 5:00 AM on Wednesday and we arrived in Crystal Beach Resort at 8:30 AM. We passed the newly constructed Subic-Clark Expressway and traffic was so light. It was a very enjoyable and pleasurable bus ride.

I immediately checked out the room assigned to us, the girls were supposed to be in the air conditioned rooms while the boys will be in the well-ventilated rooms hehe, as in electric fans(they agreed to that anyway). But in the end, I agreed to stay in the non-airconditioned room with my other lady officemate because the air-conditioned rooms were so small. We stayed on one of the boys' rooms.

I immediately left my bags, got my cell phone and shades and went to the beach with a friend. I have to check out the sea and take pictures. It was our first time in that resort and nobody knows what it really looks like. We've seen some pictures from their website but it's quite different when you look at it by yourself.

As we found out, the sea was not actually good for swimming because the waves are so big, it is actually a surfing beach. But my spirit was not dampened, I did not intend to swim anyway and besides the waves are really spectacular. What we did was to try to beat the waves but we did not win. One wave after the other came and brought us tumbling and laughing at the same time. I stayed in the water for only a few minutes but I really loved the experience.

We had a sumptuous lunch and we played "quiddler" (a short-word game) afterwards. Time really passes by so fast and we didn't notice that it was already time for dinner. It seems like what we did there was to just eat and play and have a good time and I told myself... THIS IS LIFE!

We left the beach with smiles on our a little bit sun-burnt faces but with high spiritS.

Bluer than blue

Have you tried contemplating on the lyrics of the song "Bluer than Blue" by Michael Johnson? Last night, after a tiring day in the office, I played a cd with mellow songs to try to relax me and the first song I heard was Bluer than Blue. My mind was still active despite being tired and the lyrics of the song got into me:

"After you go I can catch up on my reading, after you go I'll have a lot more time for sleeping. And when you're gone it looks like things are gonna be a lot
easier, life will be a breeze, you know I really should be glad..."

I have experienced living with someone for almost two years, it wasn't always smooth sailing. Being together with a person who has different likes, different points of view would most likely pave for disagreements. Sometimes it's healthy not having to always agree with each other, being able to exercise your patience when discussing things, being able to measure your maturity.

But there are times when you want to just be alone... do all the things you want to do, be totally independent. It should make me happy living on my own now but to be honest... it's not. I love the independence, I love the peaceful days but as the lyrics of the song said, "the nights will sure be colder".

I'm living on my own for almost two months now, I try my best to become independent, I try to make every day pass without shedding tears but it will always be... bluer than blue.

The wonders of being a mother

Yesterday I sent text messages to most of the mothers I know just to greet them a happy mother's day since it is a very important day for all the mothers and that's the cheapest way I thought that can make them to at least smile for a second. Almost all of them replied and said thank you but there's one reply that hit me and made me cry. This is her reply to me:

"I pray someday in God's time you will experience the wonders of being one"

I am not married yet but I have a fiance and we've been longing to have children of our own. I have a lot of nieces and nephews since almost all of my sisters are already married. I have somehow experienced how it is to take care of children.

I have seen them smile when their children are happy and I have seen them cry when they're sick. But I am quite sure the feeling is different when it's your own child you'll be taking care of.Having children can bring out a lot of feelings... a lot of emotions. It is not always easy to raise children, it's got a lot of challenges too. But as my friend said, being a mother is "worth it".

For now, all I can do is wait for the right time and pray hard for God to give me what I desire... to be a mother someday.

Relationship... on a woman's point of view

Women are a lot different compared to men in handling relationships. Most women tend to be a lot serious when it comes to loving the opposite sex, though there are some who do have the tendency to play around a little.

Some women lose their own personality when they are with the men they love just to make themselves fit or compatible with each other. There is a tendency for women to try hard to be liked by their partner but in a way now showing their own characteristics. They tend to hide what they really are especially during the first few months or years of the relationship.

While there are some who just can't accept how men are. Most women would say men are insensitive, men don't worry about women, men generally don't care about their partners as much as women do. But have we thought of what men thinks about us? Of how overly sensitive women tend to be, of how women worry so much and how we sometimes seem to be holding a leash on their necks.

Think about it, guys... there are so many differences between a man and a woman but there are also a lot of ways to cope with a relationship without having to sacrifice so much as to lose our own self. We just have to learn to be a little open minded, accept the differences and learn to love the man that we have despite of what he is or just get out of the relationship if you think you can't handle it.

A Tribute to my Mom

I can still recall when I was a child that whenever I get sick or hurt or whenever I am happy... the first person I call on to was my mom. She was my first teacher, my first friend. She was the one who thought me almost everything when I was still small and don't even know how to tie my shoe laces yet.

As the youngest child in the family, I can feel that I was more often favored by my mom in many ways and I was always under her protection whenever my sisters or other children try to bully me. I never felt afraid whenever she was with me.

I even remember crying everytime she went out on an errand without me in tow. I get really sad and disappointed whenever she leaves me at home. But that was when I was still small. When I grew up and was already in high school, I no longer get excited when my mom asks me come with her. I liked being with my classmates and my other friends and no longer with my mom. I don't know how she felt then but now I'm sure that it saddened her... that I hurt her whenever I decline to go out with her.

As I grow older, my mom and I seldom went out. When I had my job, I neglected my mom. I remember some occasions that I still go out with her but it was not as often as when I was a child.

I have changed but I know for a fact that my mom did not. She was still there whenever I was heart broken, whenever I have problems. We may not be that close anymore because of me but she still takes care of me. She does everything for me, cooks for me, takes care of my clothes and all the other chores at home.

When she got very sick, I know she was really in pain but she won't show it. I often hear her crying at night when she thought we're already asleep but I did not even ask her why.

And now that she's gone... I felt bad. There are a lot of things that I should have done to make her feel better, to make her happy. But it's too late for that now she's in heaven now.

Nanay... i know you're with God now and you're no longer in pain... I just want to say I'm sorry... for everything and I love you so much!